Could it be...

That venting cheered me up? I do actually feel better now (however the whole growing balls statement still stands)

Little to report again, I cooked tea tonight, which was yummy, although by the time it was on the plates I couldn't even remember what I'd put on the chicken when I was asked! Talk about goldfish memory.

However, it was extremely hot today, so hot in fact that the waistband of my jeans got damp... (my stomach sweats heaps...?) not a pleasant feeling in the slightest.

Not to mention my crappier than normal eyesight, my depth perception is funky atm too. Getting my eyes checked on Saturday, hopefully it's just the heat and being tired that's doing it, I don't really want to pay for new glasses, or wait till Janurary for my health insurance to renew so I can get more money back. Specially seeing as if I have to wear them all the time, (this depth perception thing may make me need to) I will want ot get new frames, like I picked nice-ish (but cheap) ones when I got them only for reading, but I don't think I could wear them all the time, specially seeing as my face has changed heaps in the past year and they don't suit my face so much anymore.

*yawn* It's only 8.30 and I'm already tired, but I slept pretty crappy last night, stupid heat. Ryan had a good winge about me too this morning, apparently I was actively practising bed aerobics last night, and not the good kind ;) :P Basically, I was rolling from one side of the bed to the other and kicking heaps... poor thing didn't get much sleep between clinging to the edge of the bed, fighting for the doona, and dodging kicks!

Blah... so need to come up with something exciting to write about for a change... c'mon people, questions! If I get enough questions, I might even do an FAQ all about me :)

Blah...

I haven't updated in ages have I? Man I can be lazy, but there's been a bunch of random stuff going down, and I really didn't want to just post a big rant/vent thing, and be all angsty and crap. I am not after all an emo.

Two things mostly have been bugging me, work & someone in RL. (If you know what's going on, good for you, and make sure you tell me who told you so I can forcibly silence them... am not big on this being spread around anymore than it already has)

Work has just been blah lately, Lyn is having issues realising that I can do anything, so much so that I have done practically nothing upstairs for weeks. And yet, I do everything so much more efficiently than she does, and put stuff where it belongs. Jealousy, or maybe worried that Trev will realise that I am more capable than his own wife?

Not to mention that we don't produce downstairs fast enough to require two full-time blind cleaners, and you can only clean the kitchen, sweep the factory and otherwise pretend to look busy for so much of the day, so I also spend heaps of time doing sweet FA, when there's a pile of stuff I could be upstairs doing, but Lyn is "working" (making personal calls, reading the newspaper and eating) and doesn't want me up there "disturbing her." OH... and THEN she gets upset because nothing is done, and I spend a lot of time doing nothing. GAH!

Hold that thought, going to get souvlakis....

Back now, that was nice, sat by the river and chilled, quite spot, good cheap food and sitting in the back of the pannie, our ideal date :)

Have just realised I am still venting heaps about all the crap that is going on, despite not wanting to write an angsty horrible post. Ah well... guess it's better out than in right?

And the other thing I'm pissed about is someone basically went and betrayed my trust, and told someone who told someone etc etc etc... to rather devastating effects, nearly ruined my relationship with Fungus, and has finally earned us our 2 week notice, next weekend we are out of here... SHIT GUYS.

However we are working on a place to live, and we do have a sort of option, at least for the time being, and the relationship issue is now gone, however I am still inredibly hurt and angry at this person, who I honestly thought I could trust for opening their mouth, and there's a wonderful bitchy part of me that hopes that this blantant lack of respect for my privacy and friendship has an equally devastating, if not more so, effect than it did on Fungus and myself.

And while it may take a while, I would be prepared to forgive this, ok sure maybe they slipped up when they opened their mouth, but what irks me even more than the fact they said anything at all, that they didn't even have the guts to tell me "whoops", instead let me find out through someone else (the person they told, told their workmate, who lives with Ryan's sister), which is what caused so many of the problems.

And now that they know the shit hit the fan, and that I am rightly EXTREMELY angry at them, they have now all but dropped off the face of the planet, hardly answering SMSs, and NEVER on MSN... seriously, grow up and get some f'n balls, you fucked up big and it's going to have to be dealt with one way or the other.

Otherwise the routine is the same, work, eat, sleep, with not nearly enough of the last item on the agenda. Mind you, I can never sleep enough, something always gets in the way, particularly recently as bedtime is the only time we have to discuss anything, so many D&Ms have kept me up waaaay too late, and thus result in a sleep deprived me, yet another reason I am pissed off because someone has a big mouth.

I bought my first pair of jeans in years last week too... and other than chilling around the house, I am now never out of them, they look HOT. :) They even tone down the size of my ass, (which if you know me is something I am always just a lil concerned about... so yeah, I can be vain)

This is turning into a huge entry... wow. Think I might leave you with my most recent "words of wisdom"


"A camel is a poor substitute for an elephant"

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly... or crazy.

Hooray for generalisations people. Copy and paste if you want, make sure you pick the one that suits you most and make it the subject line of your blog or email! Nothing bad will happen if you don't - no horrible deaths, genetalia falling off, and your other half won't leave you... (unless you're already a bitch/bastard that is!) However if you do, you might get a laugh from someone else!

I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be fast.

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.

I'm a NIGGA, so I MUST carry a gun.

I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be smart.

I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.

I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.

I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch

I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.

I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST be "evil" and not have any morals.

I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.

I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.

I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.

I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.

I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.

I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.

I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.

I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...

I'm a DANCER, So I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore

I WEAR SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.

I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.

I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.

I GOT A FAT ASS, So I must be a stripper

I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.

I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.

I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals

I'm ITALIAN, so I MUST have a big cock!

I'm EGYPTIAN, so I MUST be a terrorist!!

I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.

I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.

I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.

I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.

I'm INTO THEATRE & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.

I HAVE BIG BOOBS so I MUST be a whore

I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I'm RUSSIAN, o I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.

I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.

I HANG OUT WITH GAYS, so I MUST be gay too

I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.

I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited

I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13

I'm POLISH, so I MUST be dumb

I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy

Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction

Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly... or crazy.

I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.

I'm BI so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.

I'm ASIAN so I MUST have a small penis.

I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.

I DRESS LIKE A THUG so I MUST be one.

I've FUCKED UP IN THE PAST so I MUST still be a bad person.

I fixed it!

Hooray. All hail my fantasticness! :)

Hooray for a double post...

Can anyone else see two of the same posts below? Pls leave a comment if you can... I want to know if it's my comp, or the blog itself, being as it seems to not exist when I try to delete it. Stupid thing... grrr.

Totally Awesome Weekend

Actually it started Thursday night, when I went to baby sit Lisa's baby Breanna, who is exactly two months old today! We had a lot of fun, even tho she didn't seem to think sleep was a good idea, so in the end the pram parked next to the classical music on the DVD player worked rather than laying down in the cot. I moved her out into the cot abotu 20 minutes later, and she didn't even stir. Stayed asleep for 4 hours too! Lisa was very happy :)

On Friday after a truly spastic day at work, (everyone is going "OMG NEED THIS BEFORE CHRISTMAS!!" so it's really busy) I went to Cheries and had a great catch up. Saw everyone from school that I still talk to, and caught up on heaps of things, Sarah and Rob are getting MARRIED (holy fuck!) Leanne's parents divorced :( and Kaz's mum has MS. I've missed so much lately. Really should stay in touch with them more.

Then we went to Gwak's party (he's a LANner) and we saw LAN people in non-LAN settings, and they're still such geeks... it's so sweet :) Had a good time there too, even though I was tired from only sleeping 6 hours at Cherie's.

Today is a day of chilling :) I have done my laundry... or am trying to, the dryer does not appear to be heating properly. Need to find a clothes horse and hand my clothes in the sun, the weather today is awesome.

Other than that, I have slept like 11 hours, played some games and otherwise done sweet FA. I'm sure there's something more productive I could be doing, but bah!

OMG seriously... check this sexy little game out. Tony just sent it to me, and holy crap, I need him!

Anyways... I'm starving... off in search of food.

Things Not To Say...

When defending your playing neopets (yeah I still do that) as opposed to using the internet for other purposes, for example, downloading porn.

"At least I don't have to take my pants off to play neopets!"

As far as I am aware you could keep your pants on to download porn too. (Watching it could be a different story)

I really should think before I open my mouth huh?

Never thought you'd see ME at a bodyshop party huh?

Well, I went! AND I bought a couple of things, and what's more I had fun! Lis threw a Bodyshop party yesterday and I went along, bonus, she has a 7 week old baby girl, and I got to spend a lot of time cuddling her, which means that my urge to have a baby has been settled, at least for the time being.

After that mum and I went to see Fiona Boyes at the Mt Dandy pub, Fiona as always was awesome, I absolutely love her work, but the food was less than awesome... spent $25 on a steak, which was about the only 'normal' thing on the menu... seriously... braised beef cheeks in smoked ham hock stock, with "redslaw" and some other weird veggies? The steak was decidedly average... I mean, at least it was Medium-Rare but otherwise... bah. Not eating there again in a hurry. Seamus's here I come!

My neck today is absolutely hurting like hell. I must have slept funny or something stupid, because I have to be really careful to not move too fast or it seizes up and makes my entire head hurt. Feels like my head is too heavy for my neck actually. Back to the osetopath I go.

Right now there is some kind of fight going on between Fungus and Myspace... I have a space, but I hardly ever use it. I have a coupla friends that I try to keep up with there, but otherwise having already found some people's spaces and giggling about how emo they truly are, I have no more use for it.

I actually opened this blog with a purpose of sharing some news, but like most MSN convos I initiate, I have forgotten the main reason for dong so.

Anyways, if I remember why I really wanted to blog I'll do a new post.

And This Is How You Know I'm Bored...

My god, I can be such a pathetic emo...

Name: Miranda
Birthdate: 28-04.86
Birthplace: Melbourne
Current Location: My chair, my room, Melbourne
Eye Color: Brownish-hazel
Hair Color: Reddish-brown
Height: 5'6" or so...
Weight: About 60kgs
Piercings: 3 in each ear
Tattoos: Want, but don't have
Boyfriend/Girlfriend: Long-term Relationship
Overused Phraze: I dunno... I don't listen to myself when I talk!

FAVORITES
Food: Anything home-cooked
Candy: Jelly Beans
Number: 3 or 13
Color: Purple I guess...
Animal: Cats
Drink: Juice or Coke I guess
Alcohol Drink: Bundaberg Rum
Bagel: What now?
Letter: Never thought about it.
Body Part on Opposite sex: Eyes or Smile

THIS OR THAT
Pepsi or Coke: Coke
McDonalds or BurgerKing: Fast food makes me want to spew
Strawberry or Watermelon: Strawberry
Hot tea or Ice tea: Hot
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Hot Chocolate or Coffee: Coffee (bring on the caffiene!)
Kiss or Hug: Cuddles! (they can include kisses)
Dog or Cat: Cat
Rap or Punk: Punk if I HAVE to choose
Summer or Winter: Summer
Scary Movies or Funny Movies: Funnily Scary
Love or Money: Love

YOUR...
Bedtime: Not late enough to satisfy my net surfing urges
Most Missed Memory: If I've missed it, chances are I won't remember it!
Best phyiscal feature: Eyes Smile or Boobs!
First Thought Waking Up: How much longer can I sleep before I HAVE to get up without being late to work?
Goal for this year: Survive
Best Friends: Nath-baby all the way
Weakness: I love other people too much
Fears: Hieghts, Deep Water, Dark, Windy Nights, Storms... so sue me, I'm paranoid
Heritage: Sri Lankan/Australian
Longest relationship: 17 months and counting :)

HAVE YOU...
Ever Drank: Ummm... yeah
Ever been Drunk: Yeah
Ever been beaten up: No
Ever beaten someone up: No
Ever Shoplifted: No
Ever Skinny Dipped: Yeah
Ever Kissed Opposite sex: Umm... yeah!
Been Dumped Lately: No

IN A GUY/GIRL
Favorite Eye Color: No preference
Favorite Hair Color: Ditto
Short or Long: LONG!
Height: A lil taller than me, but not much
Style: Unique
Looks or Personality: Personality
Hot or Cute :cute
Drugs and Alcohol: No Drugs
Muscular or Really Skinny: No preference

RANDOMS
Number of Regrets in the Past: I don't have enough fingers to count em all!
What country do you want to Visit: NZ, UK, Sri Lanka, USA
How do you want to Die: Peacefully
Been to the Mall Lately: Yeah today
Do you like Thunderstorms: They terrify me
Get along with your Parents: As long as I don't live with them!
Health Freak: Sporadically
Do you think your Attractive: Ditto
Believe in Yourself: Usually
Want to go to College: Meah
Do you Drink: You already asked this
Been in Love: I AM in love :)
Do you Sing: Poorly at best
Want to get Married: Of course
Do you want Children: Definitely...
Have your future kids names planned out: Very much so
Age you wanna lose your Virginity: Ummm... maybe you should have asked that when I was 16 and 362 days...
Hate anyone: Not hate exactly... does overwhelming urge to kill count?

Blah...

Feel tired, somewhat overheated and my head hurts. There's nothing hugely wrong, I'm just irritable for some reason, and to be honest, nothing shits me more than being shitty for no reason. Guess I have a reason now... being shitty about being shitty? Does that count?

My stomach is also stupidly crampy... musta eaten something icky. Guess the lollipop I'm having now won't help. In my defence my blood sugar was dropping and considerably adding to my blah mood.

Today at work was soooo quiet. I was bored outta my brain. Came up with a bunch of stories I will never write, and cleaned the factory. Oh, and read a novel... good book actually. Ugly by Constance Boriens or something.

I'm sure there was a reason I wanted to update here... if only I could remember/work out why. Something funny Tweedledee said at work yesterday I guess.

I have also resolved to learn to play the guitar. This will probably infuriate Fungus and myself, but I really want to learn. I also want to learn drums. Pity I have a lousy sense of rythym.

Really nothing exciting to report... I shall seek other forms of entertainment.

About time I updated...

Just really haven't got around to posting lately, various LANs and not unpacking the computer, combined with an insane need to sleep more, and rearranging the room have been the main culprits.

I have been downstairs at work a lot lately... Lyndal is having a hard time realising I can do anything, on the flip side, the bookkeeper who I usually hate has been really nice recently... this is odd.

However, I enjoy my downstairs time heaps, the boys (Tweedledum, Tweedledee & Winnel - nicknames and surname, not going to use their real names) down there are hysterical, and provide me with a lot of amusing stories.

Me: I think Tarra went to your school Tweedledee, Tarra with the double-R, do you remember her?

Tweedledum: I didn't think they came that big!

*five minutes later after everyone stops pissing themselves laughing....*

Winnel: I dunno... I've seen some pretty big, and horrifying ones.

Me: *laughs* Ok then, Tarra with the double-R and double-Es.

Tweedledee: Not sure I remember her, but wish I did!

Much laughter and boob jokes ensued.

Also Tweedledum learned why it is not a good idea to set a bug on fire before you step on it, regardless of whether or not it is still alight when you do so. The bug and the cement floor it is on will be hot, and charred bug remains will melt into the rubber sole of your shoe. No amount of scraping will remove it.

In other news, I saw this weird little man today. I think I knew him... not sure why though. It's driving me crazy too... have established he does not work at the bottleshop or servo... I think he might be a connex dude and work at the station.

And speaking of people I think I recognise, there's this girl hanging around at Eastland that looks a lot like like Meg (who lives in what I imagine is currently a very humid Townsville) and every time I see her I go "WTF? I didn't know she was coming down here!"

Oh, and another quote from work before I forget to share "Goody, I always wanted to know what PVC tastes like when entering the digestive tract from the wrong end, take notes won't you Tweedledum?" Suffice to say Tweedledum had said somethign to offend Tweedledee and the offended party was threatening to insert a roll of PVC into Tweedledum's nether regions.

Anyhow... I am waiting for Nath to arrive, being as I have something for him, and I need me a Nath hug, I have not had one in some time.

Oh, and in other stupid news I have lost my ATM card, so I haev no access to my $ until they send a new one out, because I work during bank hours, and can't get to one do to a manual withdrawl... stupid bank being the smae as office hours...

Along with the card I lost a bus ticket, that still had 4 trips left on it. I really am 12 kinds of moron.

Also I want pizza... it is on its way, YUMMY! Bubba's Special with Anchovies... :) Yes please!

Oh, and I'm going to see Rocky Horror tonight on the big screen for the first time... EVER :D Fungus however is wimping out, but I'm sure I'll manage despite his absence.

So, without further delay, I must bid you adieu, as I think I can hear Nathan's car.

OMG Woot!

My Learner's Permit just arrived! Hurray, now I actually have the peice of plastic that says I can drive. (I mean I had that little paper thing that said I could before... but it didn't really feel real)

AND.... It's a nice photo! :)

Stay off the road people... I'm on my way!

And at the end of it all...

you're still just a stupid little girl....

You're sure everything is under control and you know which way is up, and what's what. And suddenly nothing's quite right anymore, and even with all the questions in your mind, your heart won't even grant you the ability to work out what it is you feel.

Then, when the world stops spinning, when you stop falling and finally land hard, when everything suddenly becomes painfully clear, you realise at the end of it all, you're still just a stupid little girl.

(I've long wondered about a friend's MSN name, "Still just a stupid little girl" and why she uses it. I still don't know what it is to her personally, but at the same time, I understand completely.)

A Test For Nath...

I've been on Nathan's back for a couple of days now to check my blog profile, because of the random question I've chosen to answer, and something random he unwittingly said regarding toasting marshmallows the same day I did it. However, he has not yet checked my blog profile, and know he knows there is a special post JUST for him, he will have to come here, and being as I have not supplied him with a direct profile link, he must go via this page... :) I am devious.

Anyways Nath, this is just for you! Love ya cutie! xoxox

Woot for new Time Zone!

Finally worked out where I change my time zone, no more posting at 3am for me! (well I have done a couple of 3am posts, but it said something odd, more like 8am) My timezone is correct now :)

Also... TGIF! Sleeping tomorrow + maybe seeing mum, and then hanging with Nath and seeing a movie on Sunday.

Have a wonderful weekend folks!

Disclaimer: Contains gyno talk...

close the window if the topic of Pap Smears grosses you out...




So Pap smears... what's the big deal? I just had my first one today... not at all uncomfortable. Not pleasant either, but it certainly didn't hurt. Kinda like unexciting sex with a guy who has a small dick actually :P "oh, there's something there... anyways... how bout that local sports team?" Seriously... a random bit of pressure, and some kinda odd sensation during the chylamidia smear - not a necessity and I am sure nothing will come of it but may as well make sure nothing is down there that shouldn't be - (must have been the really long cotton bud in... repeat *IN* my cervix... wasn't expecting that lol!)

I even wore pretty socks for the Dr! :)

But yeah... not at all the drama I've heard it can be. Didn't hurt, wasn't uncomfortable, literally, took like 2 minutes, if that. See what I mean about unexciting sex :P?

A Very Bad Idea

Many people these days have taken to keeping diaries, or on-line diaries also known as weblogs, I too have followed this increasingly popular trend, but after trail and error on my behalf, I have discovered my keeping a blog or a diary is not so fruitful as it appears to be for other people.

“It’s not that hard” I hear you say, but yet, I seem to have trouble, and any reader of my blog, however lacking in brain cells he or she may be would agree that it is a Very Bad Idea for me to keep a blog!

I forget them!
I diligently keep the diary/blog fairly updated and in beautiful order for maybe a month or so (though with Nath as an avid reader I have been quite well behaved recently) and then forget them, leaving them to go stale in cyber space, updating only when (IF) I remember too. I have two previously abandoned blogs, and several abandoned RL diaries. What makes anyone think I can successfully keep another… seriously? I, Miranda dare break the reputation of disorganized and lazy to do something constructive, and make use of my memory to remember something better than Alan Alda’s birthday (January 28)? BAH! Who are you fooling? Not me.

I lead a VERY boring life!
Well, I’m sure there is someone out there who would consider my life more exciting than theirs, but I have yet to meet you, I’m sure I’d LOVE to swap. 90% of my time involves working, sleeping too much, eating, surfing the net or other computer time, and spending time with my beloved. Seriously folks, the last time I left the house was to go to the doctors… and the time before that was to go to work. The last time I actually went somewhere I chose… was… was… a while ago! Now who wants to hear a blow-by-blow account of my day?

I seem to think I should put “worthy” entries in a public blog…? WTF?
Hmm… I am extremely random, and most of my thoughts and things that I would put in a diary are one-sentence entries that have little to do with anything, and tell me honestly, would YOU get excited about seeing a new entry in my diary to find that it is three words, seemingly chosen at random? “FREE THE ALPACAS” sure isn’t going to inspire awe or win me a Pulitzer prize, so I decide not to post, waiting until something note-worthy occurs, and seeing as I stated above I have a fairly unexciting life, that rarely happens.

I am rather screwed up
Actually very. Disgustingly paranoid, and hypersensitive to be honest. Hells bells, my English teacher once suggested I talk to the school counselor about something she read, when she asked us to write a diary entry about a past experience and other random shit. I don’t want to inflict that on my readers, so taking out my just plain unusual and downright creepy mannerisms and things, that doesn’t leave a whole lot of me to write about.

I ramble incessantly and have the attention span of a newt…
There’s only one way to put it. I am disgustingly long-winded. I seriously never shut up. I mean, everyone says that I could talk through wet cement. Well, not EVERYONE, mum does at any rate, Fungus just says I never stop talking. He’s nice about it. Sometimes I think he likes my rambling, specially when he’s trying to sleep, reckons it bores him to sleep. He’s joking right? I hope he’s joking. Mind you, he can talk too, he can spend a good couple of hours at his sister's place when he was "only going to be a few minutes" I'm the same when it comes to shopping though... especially when I'm on a retail therapy splurge...

See? I told you so. I can’t stick to one topic for very long, and most of my topics are utter crap! Who wants to read an entry about a whole bunch of crap that spewed from my fingertips? No one, precisely.


So why, oh why do I keep a blog? Good question, I’m not sure. It could be a trend thing, but I never was much of a (martyr before and I ain’t bout to start nothing new) sheep and I never do things just because they’re “cool”. The mystery eludes even the smartest of smart.

However as it has been proven for you above, it is a Very Bad Idea that I keep a blog, it is now that I can disclaim any responsibility for insanity that may occur to you, if you dare venture into the depths of my blog.

Wank factor = High....

A car's numberplate that I saw today...

BALSAX

Seriously...

Onto a topic I soooo shouldn't be thinking about...

Baby names. I'm not pregnant, nor do I intend to be any time soon (just renewed my pill perscription for another year) Tertia started it, and now it has me thinking. (Also I figure this will be better than some long boring angry rant anyway.)

I am a self-confessed baby name freak. I've been picking names since I can remember. Alison, Faye, Willow, Skye, Jordan, Justin, Clara.... all these names have come and gone on my list of "must name my future child" (I am still partial to Alison though, after my aunt) and now I have a whole list of new ones, a few of which I expect will stay on the list.

Right now I like:

Reina (female, Ray-na) It is Spanish for small queen. Ryan liked Rei (but as I will explain later it does not fit my "naming rules" It is also a nice way of naming my future daughter (I will, nay I MUST have at least one daughter) after her future father as Ryan means little prince. Assumign things go shit, and Ryan is not the father, Reina would leave the list as it is 'our' name.

Abigail which would most likely stay as a middle only. For my mum, Gail who would kill me if I christened a daughter Gail, as she hates that name. Would be shortened to Abby if it was given as a first.

Natalie for Nathan. Nuff said. (If i get an abundance of Y chromosomes Nathan would become a middle.... another 'naming' rule)

Kaylie (Like Haylie with a 'K') spelt this way purely to annoy Nath, also I think it is pretty. However unless for some bizarre reason Nath was the father I would not use that name it is 'his' name. In which case if there was a Nathranda runnign around she would have to be spelled Kaylee... there is no way I would win that argument.

Caitlyn mum wanted to call me this, and I have always thought it was pretty. I do not however like Caitlyn Fullerton it rhymes. (Another naming rule)

Kathryn (spelling not optional) after a very close friend of mine, would probably shorten to Katie, which I also think is nice. Would not however settle for just Katie.

Alison For my aunt, however if it became a first I would shorten it as a nickname to Ally. Alison Fullerton rhymes also... that is bad.

Julia/Juliet after Ryan's mother, as a middle only. I think it is a gorgeous name.

Winona would be shortened to Noni, for my grandmother who I call Noni (assuming, god forbid she had died by then)

Bridie (spelling optional Brydie is nice too..) just a pretty Celtic name I like.

That's a lot of girls... I don't even know if Ryan likes half of those. Although Reina and Natalie my two main contenders are also his favourites.

Onto boys...there are two names as a must, James and Hamish, both are family names. Hamish would become a middle only though. I do not like the name enough to make it a first, however it is special and I do want it to stay in the family. David (Ryan's father) is also necessary due to their naming traditions.

There are few boy names I actually really like. I guess they just don't seem to have the same 'ring' as girls names do for me.

Charlie. Don't question this. I just like Charlie Fullerton. Particularly Charlie James Fullerton.

Nathan/iel as I said if I don't get my Natalie, Nathan or Nathaniel (what Nath wants his name to be) would become a middle. Charlie Nathaniel sounds ace. However I am aware that if I ever intend to use Nathan or Nathaniel as a middle name I must first also approve the first name with the namesake. (As I would have to with Natalie and the middle name. Fortunatley he likes Natalie Abigail)

So yeah, they're the boy's names I like.

I am iffy about Lachlan.... every child named Lachlan I have ever met has been... well feral. (Including my father apparently) However I would feel bad about naming Abigial and Julia and David and not using Lachlan. Perhaps spelling Lachlyn/Locklyn or something as a girl's middle... though with Reina Juliet and Natalie Abigail, I need to have another girl... Brydie Locklyn, Winona Locklyn... meah... I'll think about that one.

Naming rules... well that's just too long to post now, I need to sleep. Will do that later on.

The bad side to blogging...

I love having a blog, it is so much easier for me to use than to have an actual diary to write in, I never remember to keep those. It's a good way for me to remember random little things that happen, and to keep people who I don't stay in touch with updated more often.

The bad side is that it is a public blog, and people I know in RL, Nath, Fungus and Jamie for example read it, which means I find that I am often censoring what I want to say. Partly because there is stuff one or all of my readers do not need/want to know about me, and partly because there is stuff about them that they may not want other people knowing. (Hence the whole being extremely vague about Nathan thing)

Gah... maybe I should just start a completely private blog. But I enjoy having readers, I like the occasional comments and feedback that I get from people. (BTW, feel free to share this blog with anyone you know who would enjoy even a specific post) But by the same token, the one thing I want to blog about... (hell shout from the rafters if could) would bring the world crashing down in so, so many ways, if any of the aforementioned readers got wind of it.

If only I could succesfully keep a diary...

So much has happened...

and yet when anything huge happends, I rarely blog it. Though Nathan, the one how bitches he never gets to know what is going on because I don't blog has been hearing all of it as soon as it happens anyway... he's the main reason i spend time blogging sometimes.

I don't know where to begin... I am no longer angry at jay. i still don't think that he holds anything i say in much regard at all... but that is how he will always be. he actually called to talk to me about it the other night. niether one of us said sorry, but it seems to be cool now. And keeping things cool between us for the sake of his best mate and the love of my life (Fungus) is important.

Interesting... and Nicole could never try and be nice to him for my sake....

My beautiful dog Murphy had to be put down on Thursday. :( He'd been sick for a while, and it turns out he'd had bowel cancer. I am going to miss him immensely.

Nathan copped that first hand, came and got me from work when I found out. He's never seriously seen me cry before, and honestly I'm not sure he knew what to do with me, he seemed a bit uncomfortable. I think that's just a difference in our personal space thing, I am far more touchy-feely than he is, especially when upset.

It turns out one of dad's friends from school died earlier this year as well, though we didn't find out till recently. I only met George once, but he rocked, he was a really funny, nice guy, made his own Guinness stuff at home, and never took any shit from dad! It is very sad at the moment, with so many people (and animals) I liked dying. Good thing I am not an emo or I would believe they are dying to get away from me :P

I think I forgot to mention I am no longer jealous about everything that was happening with Nath. I am more or less happy for him... though still feel extremely protective, especially with everything being not hugely certain. It remains obvious however, that unless everyone loves him as much as I do, that they are completely crazy in my eyes.

Mum just rang, nothing huge to report... the choir concert yesterday went well. Ryan did the sound, and I videoed. We are going to make DVDs for the choir of the concert. It should be brilliant! :)

Otherwise I really think that's everything I can report here without causing major dramas... (why did I tell RL people about this...?:P)

Keep smilin people, I am!

I am an emotional person...

There's no two ways about it. In a single secomd I can experience elation with complete enthusiasm and intensity, enjoying the moment and riding on the high. In the same second I will be crashing down, hitting the bottom hard and continuing to fall.

I am the same with my friends. I love you dearly, but the passion and love I feel so strongly for you can quickly turn to irritation, and for a few brief seconds I might actually be angry, even at the one I love most. In the next few seconds however, the storm subsides and I'm back to loving you as much as ever.

I am a never-ending roller-coaster, and anyone who knows me will know this. Anyone who puts up with it is even more amazing than even the best song writers could describe.

Which is why my respect, unlike my love as I am a loving person, is reserved for a certain few. Those few who know me and love me just as I am, those who respect me, and those who I love so fiercely that it can even seem scary.

To those few, I am a mother bear with her cubs, I would do anything to make them happy, and anything to keep them safe.

You guys mean the world to me, and you know who you are.... I love you.

Yay for allergies....

so turns out something outside is blossoming... and it hit me in teh face like a tonne of bricks... fark! itchy and sneezy.

and now i've taken my hayfever pills... and now i can't have any booze tonight when i go play pool. fark!

and once more with feeling... FARK

I'm alive...

so the LAN didn't go so hot. long story short there was a huge power fuck up.

in other news, i have learned that actions truly do speak louder than words.

as a result i am absoultely furious at Jay and hope for his benefit he doesn't show up any time soon...

however nath has managed to endear himself even further to me. i am always going to love that boy.

oh... and LISA HAD THE BABY! Breanna was born August 29, weighing a whopping 9.5 pounds!

yay... so there was a random update for you...

So Nath's demanding updates...

that is to say he's checked twice recently and had no updates. He only checks if I tell him to as well... so its defintely time I wrote some more!

Not that there's much to tell. I've been working, and then coming home and chilling to music or going to the gym after work.

Had some time with Nath too :) nice to get some time with ya best mate. (Do it more often people!)

Otherwise nothing is new. I'm sinking comfortably into a new routine of work, gym and sleep, with the occasional social visit or singign lesson thrown in.

Mum's 50th birthday is soon in other news, so there will be a party... and Ryan will get to meet my rellies! Oh dear... :S

Going now... *ciao!*

I have learned more...

Guilt may be a powerful aphrodisiac. But love is more powerful still.

I have learned...

Guilt is a powerful aphrodisiac.

That is all.

Love Is Just A State Of Mind

“Well you've got me standin' deaf and blind...cause I see love as just a
state of mind...and who knows what it is that we might find...if we try.” – Don McLean

“Dreams unwind
Love's a state of mind
Your dreams unwind
Love's a state of mind” - Fleetwood Mac

See… now I don’t want love to be just a state of mind. Because if it is, I guess it means I’m imagining how happy I am when Ryan cuddles me. It would also mean I’m imagining the joy when the first thing I see every morning is his face. Not to mention how good it feels when he holds my face or my neck when he kisses me. I couldn’t deal with this not being real. It’s all too nice and comfortable. And if it isn’t real… what is?

And Don McLean and Fleetwood Mac aren’t the only musicians to claim love is a state of mind. The Bryan Adams and some guy called Roy Clark sang the same thing…

Answer me this… if love truly is a state of mind, why can you not just switch it off, the same way you can just go “no, I’m being too angry about this, calm down some?” Why does a state of mind affect you so much you can laugh or cry, basically do a complete emotional 180 at the mention of it? There is nothing else that does that so powerfully.

State of mind… bah… then why can I be so confused about something and not be able to put it out of my mind if its truly a state….?

Sorry to disappoint you Don, it’s a beautiful saying but I just can’t agree.

Things Miranda didn't know...

That 3 phone lines can ring 11 times in 4 minutes. Usually simultaneously and that I could handle them all while not swearing, and trying to fix a very broken fax. (stupid paper jam... and Mark! TURN YOUR FAX ON! TAKES 5 MINUTES TO REJECT A NON CONNECTTION WHEN YOUR FAX IS OFF! 5 MINUTES I CAN'T SEND ANOTHER FAX!!!)

That I would actually give a serious enough of a damn personally and emotionally about what Nath and I were talking about the other day (and in my previous post) to decline to offer advice on the grounds of being too biased, and being confused about my head and my hearts' simultaneous messages. Yeah... jealous Miranda still lives.

It's too hard to go into without letting everyone know what's going on, and privacy still sucks lol. See cutie, I respect you? Gah... I can't explain it! But I have worked out my brains thinking on it and why I am jealous about this whole situation.

What else didn't I know? I've forgotten...

Anyways random random random... goodnight.

And Now For Something Completely Different...

Miranda... jealous?

That's right folks, I actually felt a pang of jealousy this afternoon. Nothing huge mind you... but there was a definte twinge in my stomach (and for a brief, pleasant second it had nothing to with the period cramps) and after much thought I've realised it was jealousy.

Nath told me something (and out of respect for him I am not going to mention it I don't know who he's told, and a few people he knows read this blog.) Privacy sucks yadda yadda, so no gossip for you! And it actually made me jealous.

Now I'm not quite sure whether it was his feelings about the whole situation, or the fact that there was that situation or what...

But you happy now babe? Jealous!

RIP Harrison and Lars

Two of my mice died today. Which is really sad. And I'm kind of confused why, they were fine yesterday but today they were covered in mites. I can treat mice mites with a specific spray, assuming I had found any to spray.

When I woke up, I noticed Lars looked funny, and when I picked him up I realised he was dead, so I shuffled everything around to find poor old Harrison who was really sick. He was shaking and having a hard time breathing so I shook off all the mites (and there were literally thousands of them!) and made him as comfortable as I could. He seemed to be getting better for a little while, because he had a drink and seemed more alert, but then he was getting sleepier and having trouble standing.

Ryan and I had to go out then, so I picked Harrison up and held him and patted the white patch on his head the way he liked and said goodbye to him, then I put him down, he had a big stretch and just curled up.

I'm really glad he was so peaceful right then, because he'd been so uncomfortable before. But I've never actually been there when one of my mice has died before (well... awake and watching) and I was surprised with how calm I was. I haven't even cried, and I had a good hour of sobbing when Maynard died.

I mean I am sad, but being there to say goodbye to him and knowing he'd been comfortable as possible and having his head rubbed the way he liked it just ebfore he died makes it less sad.

Rest in peace Lars and Harrison... I will miss you both.

TGIF!

Well I have about 20 minutes before I need to go to work so I thought I'd do a quick update.

TGIF! I mean, I'm used to work, and enjoy it, and the hours are great (C'mon getting out of bed at 7.30 am and still having time to blog because work is so close... sweet or what?) but I just need a break from doing anything for a couple of days. I'm a bit worn out because of some rotten cold thing that I've had for the last 2 or 3 days. My tonsils have been huge and I have been living on custard. I am still a bit crappy today, but am no longer convinced that I am dying. Must be the cocktail of medicines I have been using.

There's nothing hugely new to report... Oh, Iris has now reached the halfway point in filling bookings so it looks promising! and Redrum have finally finished remixing a couple of songs, and they sound pretty damned sweet!

Anyway I need to get to work.... ciao.

Edit 5/08/06 - Thanks to Anon for pointing out the dodgy link, turns out I can't spell!

Rambling..

And now... just for fun.....

Let's watch Miranda's world fall to bits for some inane reason!

My god I was a complete and total wreck on Saturday. It started with a huge bawling session in the morning trying to talk some shit through with Jay. Nothing to do with him, about the crap Fungus and I are going through right now. That left me curled up in Jay's lap and having a good sob into his shoulder. Then Julia came in, and was like "what's wrong?" and even though I'm starting to settle down a bit, I can't tell her anything. I'm eternally grateful to Jay's "Just a rainy day" answer, but how can I tell Ryan's mother I'm crying about Ryan? I felt kind of bad for ignoring her, but there are some things I can't tell her, and the fact that I'm teetering on the edge of screaming my lungs out at her son and hurling a few heavy things at his head is not one of them.

The rest of Saturday was more or less a blur, Erin turned 15 and had a party (more on that later) and I actually felt really good for the whole day. Especially because after the party I was going to go see mum and get a whole bunch of curry stuff (again more explanations to come)... at least I THOUGHT I was.

So... Ryan decides all of a sudden he doesn't want to drive me, and I decide all of a sudden I NEED to be anywhere but there, and the only place I want to go is mum's. Enter much whinging and crying and nagging and general disagreement on both sides. (This all started because I had stated clearly TWICE that I wanted to go to mum's when he and Jay started to discuss doing something else that night, and had been deliberatley ignored)

Finally I get out of Ryan that he is feeling hayfever-ish and doens't want to be around mum's cats who he is VERY allergic to. Reasonable enough I guess, although by then I was pretty damned hysterical, still feeling raw from my crying session with Jay, and that was completely unreasonable.

Fungus, being as sweet as he is, patiently tried to explain why he didn't want to go then, and somehow managed to use some wrong words...

I.Hate.Being.At.Your.Parents'

Cue instant hysteria, anger and silence directed him. Followed by a fair degree of swearing - once I got over the silence that is.

But fuck... that instant feeling of rejection of what is essentially a part of me, like I'd been hit in the stomach with a demolition ball. Even once I settled down, and realised that he didn't mean that he hated my parents' house, more that he disliked being at my parents' when he is being hyperallergenic and will probably get an asthma attack from the cat fur, the hurt stayed around for ages.

I'm not even sure where I'm going with this post anymore... I guess it's showing how naieve I can be. For some reason I'd got it into my head that because I loved and trusted Fungus so much, he wouldn't be able to hurt me (Funny, seeing as you always hurt the ones you love)and the fact that something he'd said had caused me so much hurt and upset (even if it was unfounded) shattered my world. Absolutely.Fucking.Shattered.

It took a good couple of hours before I'd settled down from that. As a result I am still rather worn out today. On the upside, Ryan and I seem to be better than ever, even with Ryan having a horrible and unexplained bout of hayfever that is making him thoroughly miserable, money is not being quite so unhappy this week (fingers crossed) and we may have a BEAUTIFUL bedroom available with his stepsister.

Corrie, Ryan's older stepsister has her own place, which as I mentioned is really gorgeous, and I am very envious of. There's still a spare bedroom there, that Ryan and I are looking at moving into. Now I know I can afford my share, but I am concerned about Fungus only having sporadic work thorough his dad and pizza driving for a friend who runs a pizza shop. I know I can't afford for the both of us but Fungus is so desperate to not live here anymore I'm worried he's not thinking things through properly.

Will need to have a talk about that, especially now that the whole bad mood shit seems to be over at last! (I am expecting relapses also, but things are generally better.)

There's so much I want to post. I haven't really updated about how much I am enjoying work, and how awesome the people there are, and how I think this guy Kyle has a crush on me, because he says nothing and has a goofy all the time I'm downstairs, when I know he's perfectly capable of normal conversation. And my list of injuries that I've obtained at work, I am a very clumsy person.

I also wanted to post about Erin's birthday party, seeing as she says I don't write enough about her, and how I cooked curry tonight. I love cooking curry. (That whole things being a part of me thing)

Gah... although now I'm used to work and its hours now, I should find a chance to update more often seeing as I am less prone to falling into bed and dying as soon as I get home. Though writing around gym sessions after work is tricky too, being as if I'm not dead in bed I'm at the gym THEN dead asleep.

I have a singing lesson tomorrow... at 7pm. That's crap, leaves no space for gym, because it would be like 8.30 by the time we got there and the place closes at 10. I can spend 3 or so hours there very easily. I'm sure it wouldn't be so bad if I spent less time in the spa though...

Anyways I need sleep.

Night

Just a quickie

I'm waiting for jay to come get me to go to to the gym, and he should have been here about 5 minutes ago.

Work is great, the people are awesome and I am loving it! The hours are good, I can sleep plenty, and the pay is better than I was expecting too!

Other than that I am alive and well, hopefully a longer update will come later.

I Start Work Tomorrow...

That's right, in 10 hours I'll be rocking up for day one of a job I'll have for hopefully a very long time. No getting sick bullshit I hope.

The only problem with this is that I am extremely wired about the whole situation and can't sleep. (May also be the Creme Caramel dessert and the Cookies and Cream Icecream I had earlier)

Also tomorrow morning I need to shower and makeup and everything before I go to work. (Not that any other morning will be different) but I will have to share the bathroom with Kyla... actually she was great last time we had to get ready around each other... but I hate sharing the bathroom! Tomorrow night I will shower before bed, that way I'll only have hair and makeup. 20 mins tops.

Warm milk before bed is supposed to be good... wish I could say the same of warm Bundy. It's been out of the fridge all day and is no longer icy. (Wonder why, we've been running the heater all day) it's not helping as much as I would have hoped. and there's only one more so it's not like I can drink till I pass out. Not that that's a good idea either... hangover + first day of work = stupid.

I've had a couple of comments about my blog too. Ryan's other sister Erin said she liked the blog, but I should talk about her more... so HI ERIN! And Jamie was glad he got included in the friends I talk about a lot section. Oh... and Nathan's always at me to update. He likes reading about shit I've already told him about.

Had another huge go at Ryan today. Not sure what's going on here other than major moody crap on both ends. He's being miserable and taking it out on me, and I'm just generally being a total cow. I guess it's living in a shoebox with little money, and with his parents.

Anyways going to try and sleep now.... wish me luck!

The Cast & Crew

Trying to give you an idea of all the people you might read about.

Main Characters: (People I write about most)

Me (Miranda): Author and main character in the blog. 20yo, brunette with brown/green/hazel eyes. Live with Ryan & his family. Check my profile and about me post for all the details.

Fungus/Ryan: My beloved boyfriend of just over a year. Excellent musician and in THE MOST AWESOME BAND IN THE WORLD also into computer gaming and runs his own LAN with his friends.

Mordoc/Nathan: My gorgeous boy. Contrary to popular belief we are not, and have never been going out. This doesn’t mean we don’t love each other to bits though. First time I met him he filled my top with shaving cream… and I’m still friends with him after 2 years! All-round good guy this one, even though he teases me. He also runs the LAN

Mum & Dad: Fairly self explanatory really. Have been together for 22 years, but I cannot imagine why. Mum currently works full time and cannot sing to save her life. She is however so passionate about music I will forgive her. Dad is not working right now, but is looking to do something after being out of work because he was sick. We had a horrible relationship a few years ago. This is repairing itself. I can’t say I completely forgive him… but I don’t hate him anymore. Both somewhat psycho, but in a nice way.

Alastair/Alejandro: My older-younger brother. Awesome guy now that he’s grown up. Plays bass in THE MOST AWESOME BAND IN THE WORLD and has a very cool girlfriend Zoe.

Cam: My younger-younger brother. The delinquent. Is actually very bright, however chooses to put his intelligence to the wrong uses. When he grows up some I may tolerate him more. He has settled down slightly in the last little while, and we could wind up being almost normal again.

Random Friends (Still loved immensely... more or less)

Eurox/Jay: Fungus’s best mate and a close friend of mine. Love him to death, but we seem to get on each others’ nerves quite a bit. He also runs the LAN

Aday & Pseudonym/Laura: Two separate people, very much one being. Friends of ours who live entirely too far away (Maribyrnong) Aday also runs the LAN while Pseudonym and I watch. Aday’s real name is Adrian. I don’t think anyone other than the people signing his paycheck call him that. Both horrible computer geeks, in the nicest sense.

Sycostic/Jad/God: So named because he is tall and everyone looks up to him, the other LAN admin. Sweet guy, unfortunate habit for finding girls that are too young for him.

Jamie: Friend of mine I met at a party quite a while back now. Hugely into theatre and music. Do not see him nearly often enough despite living near by, but spend hours on MSN.

Nickers/Nicole: Self appointed best friend. By self appointed she calls herself my best friend. I’m not sure whether it was when she decided to start being a bitch, picking up creepy guys, or having casual sex with said creepy guys (and expecting me to either do the same or wait around while she did) that the feeling stopped being mutual. She is also Fungus’s ex girlfriend and despite claiming to respect our relationship is quite blatantly lying. She is also what Nathan would call a Mental Athlete

Ryans Family &People I Live With: (Not just the people in this house)

Julia: Fungus’s mum. Absolutely lovely lady. Puts up with Ryan and me not having jobs or paying rent.

Ronnie: Fungus’s step-dad. Quite frankly a bit weird, came over from Oklahoma to marry Julia last year, has 3 kids of his own in the USA.

Rachel: Ryan’s older-younger sister, moved out at the beginning of the year.

Kyla: Ryan’s middle-younger sister, talks incredibly fast.

Erin: Ryan’s youngest sister, has my old math teacher!

Dave: Ryan’s dad, does architectural designs on the computerand is totally awesome at it.

Sally: Ryan’s step mum. Very into music and even had Ryan judge a guitar competition at the school she teaches at.

Corrie: Ryan’s step-sis. Awesome chick, has her own house nearby. It’s a great place and I am v. envious of it.

Billi: Ryan’s step-sis. Loves sports and is doing year 12. I think she’s going to be a PE teacher. Owns a Vesper, or something similar at any rate.

My Extended Family (This isn't it, but I doubt I'll write about the others much)

Noni: My grandmother, a retired nurse. Totally awesome woman, my only living grandparent.

Ab & Pete: My aunt and uncle. Ab is Dad’s sister. Have 3 kids, and live with Noni.

Phee: 13yo, eldest cousin. We’re getting closer again now that she’s a skeptical teen, and I’m just skeptical. Is not into boys yet… thank goodness. Is right at that stage where everything is too big for her and she is ungainly. Once she grows into herself more she will be gorgeous.

Boo: 9 (I hope… please don’t let me say he’s 9 if he’s actually turning 10!) So named because peek-a-boo was his favourite game as a baby. Quiet little bloke, very thoughtful and logical in his actions. Prefers science to Judo classes.

Gus: 5yo hyperactive, hard to understand properly, and just full of life. Has a mop of carrot-red curly hair and these bright blue eyes that pop out of his face. Needs constant reminders that he doesn’t need to shout.

In Memory

Peter Lucas: A friend of the family who went to school with Dad. Passed Monday 14th July. May he rest in peace. Much love to Gwen, Nick, Julian and Lizzie.

Oscar Kean: My aunt and uncle's cat, who was actually older than their eldest daughter who is 13. He was put to sleep this morning after having hepatits, feline AIDS and who knows what else. His spirit will terrorise the local wildlife forever.

On a lighter note, the youngest cousin Gus suggested they bury only Oscar's body... and leave the head sticking out...

More TUI

Well... I'm drinking again. The last post was pretty harsh. In fact I'm gonna private it if at all possible and/or edit it so that I'm not taking down someone in public. A blog is cool and made for venting and remembering things. But a public blog is not meant for abusing someone.

Today I had to go to work and sort out Traineeship things. Looks like I might be doing a Cert III instead, because Trev really wants someone who can do MYOB. They're in the process of switching to MYOB from QuickBooks (Accounting/Bookkeeping programs) and while they'll have someone show em what to do for a while, there's going to be a need for a MYOB pro... ie me. Fortunately I was good at Accounting in Yr 11. Passed with 91% on the final exam to be exact. Highest score over both classes :)

I also went to the gym again yesterday. Have worked out a nice little set of reps to do for my arms, back and stomach. Now all I need to do is find something for my ass and thighs and we're in the money. Well not the money so much as the incredibly short shorts.

I'm also going again tomorrow, with Nathan this time. I expect to get severely shown up. Nathan is pretty damned fit. But it does mean I get to sit in the front seat of Renae. Renae for the record is Nath's new car. He joked about calling it Renae, and I'm holding him to it. It's a good name, suits the style of car. Dark blue hatchback. Looks like a Renae... or is that Renee? We all know how fond he is of the Double-E spelling of Kaylee

Man I'm going on about practically nothing now. I'm sure there was something else I meant to talk about. Ah well. I'll add it in or something later.

Miranda

New Blog... New Me?

Apparently around the time I decided to start this new my life changed in a few different ways too. I guess it's symbolic in some weird way, but I didn't see everything happening when it did.

In the past week I've joined a gym, got a job, changed my preference for what I want to be doing with my life, and had a major personality change.

The personality thing is the most interesting. I've been generally more positive, enegetic and decisive, but far more short tempered with people about little things. Poor Fungus has had his head bitten off so many times recently, I'm surprised he bothers to speak to me at all. Mind you, he's not been a ray of sunshine either.

Other random things that now annoy me, people teasing me about little shit that I would usually not care about I've been taking offence much quicker than usual. And previous personality traits that I didn't notice. Mostly about responsibility and knowing when it is and is not yours. I don't really want to explode and tell them what I think either. I would probably be extremely unfair for one, and I'm fairly sure they couldn't deal with it anyway. I don't really want to be left with a blubbering mess that I created.

I guess I'm being hypocritical. It's not my responsibility, and its not in my control. If they want to do this I should let them. It's just hard hearing about it, and knowing that they could do better for themselves if they thought about things in the right priority.

Fark, I'm on on hell of a soapbox tonight! See what I mean about new me? I wouldn't rant like that previously... or would I? Well maybe not so clearly about who I'm on about. (Don't bring up the Nicole Rant either. She doesn't read this!)

I'm not sure about this whole "new me" that seems to be emerging. I mean I like the whole going to the gym thing, and the new job. But the hella evil bitchyness? Not so cool...

Edited 21/07/06 to remove evilness towards person in question.

Who's a smart cookie then?

So uhh... it was Sunday when I wrote that post. Thus I have not yet done my tax forms. *Stares hopelessly at them and cringes*

I already did them once this year to be honest (being the first financial year I paid tax and all, I haven't done one before, and was very proud when I looked at my certificate things employers send out, the Tax booklet I had to fill in, and did it all correctly! Then when I'm boasting to mum on the phone about how smart I am, she reminds me I got Centrelink pay as well.

I'd forgotten this, and wasn't aware that if I was working as well as getting paid, it was taxable income. (If you don't work, it generally falls into the tax-free threshold) Thus I have to re-do my forms. I really don't want to, but I want to see what I can get from it.

So while I'm procrastinating I'm busy admitting various embarassing things to Nathan via MSN. Fortuantely he loves me enough not to tease me. That boy can get anything out of me. (I honestly believe that he'll know if I get pregnant before Ryan does)

Anyways the net is being really slow (I think we've been capped), so I need to make it more slow by playing Neopets for a while... :D

Busy Week Ahead

I have a week before I start work, at the moment it's looking at little like this.

Sunday (tomorrow): Fill in Tax Return crap... more calculations and money issues.

Monday: Biala (my kinder group) for the last time. Coffee with Ryan (decided we need some 'us' time)

Tuesday: Harrass Sarina Russo for money for work clothes and transport to work. Singing Lesson with Daniel. Iris meeting, I am not an Admin or anything, but will be more or less stuck there. (After all it's happening at my place)

Wednesday: Shopping with Sarina Russo's money (I hope) need new shirts and hopefully a bra. Possibly show up to my lil bro's bail hearing if Mum can't get the day off work.

Thursday: Cruise South Melbourne and Parahan dropping flyers for a friend's show.

Friday: Nothing as yet. Probably wash clothes and panic, also further harrass Sarina Russo (they're my job network people) in case they haven't paid me anything yet.

That's my week so far. So much for relaxing before I start work!

I also want to up my singing lessons to once per week being as I am only going once per fortnight. But on the mere pittance I am going to be earning I will have a choice of singing lessons or gym membership.

I am definitely leaning towards the gym. Means I will improve my muscle tone, and toned Miranda = HOT Miranda. Also having a stronger back etc will mean that I can spend less time in the osteopath's office, because my spine will be supported better. Singing is great, but doesn't honestly have as many benefits for me.

I'm just rambling now... I need to promote my blog better. I need more readers!



So far... that's it. Erk. That's a lot.

First Genuine Entry

Hooray! This is my first proper post in my blog. And as the name of my blog suggests, I am genuinely TUI. I have had 2 Bundys. However I should go slow, this is my last drink... by force... after this I am out.

This new blog coincides nicely with new job. Although I'm not going to get a new blog everytime I change jobs... I start next week as a receptionist thing, and I'm doing my Cert I & II in Business Admin, which is only like year 11 level, but if I ever wind up learning to be a child minder thing, I will at least have a foot in the TAFE door so to speak.

As I mentioned in my previous blog I was going to go and visit my younger brother in Juvie. Turns out it wasn't so bad. So not bad that I am probably going to go again tomorrow. If mum ever calls me to let me know what is going on that is.

My ankle hurts too. I'm not sure what I've done, but feels like a sprain. Is not puffy or bruised, just freaking sore. Must be the gorgeous knee-high boots with 4inch heels Nathan just bought me. I have been reluctant to part with them, and as a result, my ankles must be taking a lot of strain. Better switch back to my red Doc Martens, so that my ankles can be reinforced again.

By popular request... NATHAN HAS A CAR gorgeous lil 97 5 speed Lancer. The only problem I have is it's two door, which means I am permanently stuck behind the backseats with no real way to escape. I rarely get shotgun priveliges. I am not the girlfriend, nor am I likely to be taller than whoever else is in the car, which indicates a need for more legspace, so backseat it is for me. Mind you, I practically lived in the middle back of his old Magna. That was "my" seat, even if the rest of the backseat was empty, I would have that spot. May as well get used to it.

Anyways, nothing else of major note, my Bundy is almost gone and I'm tired.

Night All.

Finally!

It took a while, but I have finally got my blog perfect! (I really shouldn't have fiddled with anything in the first place) However, now that's it's looking beautiful I'm going to start posting more often. Im very proud of my work, includign the banner which I made myself. :)

Anyways, Ryan's off to band practise, so I'm off to hang out with mum. Ciao

What is it with some people?

They see only one side of the story and then when I try to present mine, I am automatically wrong. I have feelings and responses to the situation too ya know... and they might... just MIGHT be different from yours.

Oops...

Looks like I broke something. No idea why the text is appearing all the way down there, instead of next to the sidebar. Will fix it soon... I hope.

All About Me

NAME: Miranda

NICKNAMES: Mirandabelle (penname) SexyNurse (Gaming name) Toots,

BIRTHDAY: 28 April 1986, that makes me 20! (I just put 20-something in my profile so I won't have to update it for the next few years)

HEIGHT: 5'5 maybe 5'6

HAIR: Not sure anymore. About three different dye colours.

EYES: Depends on my mood, usually some kind of brown/green/hazel

SIBLINGS: Two brothers, you want?

LIVING ARRANGEMENTS: Live with Ryan's (my boyfriend) mum, stepdad and two younger sisters.

MARITAL STATUS:Taken, very happily! Love you m'boy.

MOVIES I LIKE: Rocky Horror Picture Show, Blues Brothers, Cat Ballou, Blazing Saddles, Practical Magic, Parenthood, Fight Club, Battle Royale, Sound Of Music, Matrix Trilogy, Harry Potter, LOTR Trilogy, M*A*S*H, Jumanji, Mrs Doubtfire, Twins, Junior, Grease, Nightmare Before Christmas, Oh Brother Where Art Thou? City Of Angels, Armageddon

MOVIES I DON'T LIKE: Anything starring Jim Carrey or Chevy Chase. I also dislike most Adam Sandler movies, except Happy Gilmore and Bill Madison. Mr Deeds isn't too bad either.

MUSIC I LIKE: Redrum,Bonnie Tyler, MeatLoaf, Jim Steinman, Foo Fighters, Evanescence, Nightwish, Allison Krause, Sherrie Austin, Don McLean, Fleetwood Mac, Korn, Static X, Ella Fitzgerald, Aretha Franklin, Sam Brown, Sam Cooke, Sam and Dave, Jim Croce, Avril Lavigne, Carly Simon, Aerosmith, Boomtown Rats, Breaking Benjamin, H.I.M, The Kinks, Black Sorrows, Vika and Linda, Ry Cooder, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Nickelback, Metallica, Disturbed Matchbox 20, Andrews Sisters, Frank Sinatra, Cole Porter, Queen, Weird Al Yankovic, Seether, Live, Lifehouse, Linkin Park, John Lennon, Beatles, Buddy Holly, Chuck Berry, Joan Baez, Joni Mitchell, Killing Hiedi, Smashmouth, The Doors, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Machine Gun Fellatio, John Williamson, The Bushwhackers, Kasey Chambers, Shakira, Carole King, The Bangles, The Loose Roos, Fiona Boyes, Gordon Lightfoot... the list goes on, but that is all I can think of now.

SOUNDTRACKS I LIKE: Phantom Of The Opera, Les Miserables, Sound Of Music, Rocky Horror Picture Show, Blues Brothers, Grease, Cat Ballou, City Of Angels, Armageddon,

MUSIC I DON'T LIKE, BUT CAN RESPECT AS IT IS STILL REAL MUSIC: AC/DC, Rolling Stones, Jimi Hendrix, Blondie, Bob Dylan (how I hate his voice), Donovan *shudder*, those horrible Irish Patriotic Songs or mournful ballads about some young kid getting shot up in a war.

MUSIC I JUST PLAIN DON'T LIKE: HawkWind, anything Acid, Techno or Trance, and most Rap

TV SHOWS I LIKE: M*A*S*H, Charmed, Stargate SG1, Staragte Atlantis, Futurama, Family Guy, Law & Order SVU, Without A Trace, Bewitched, The 4400, Neighbours, Home Improvement, Play School (still I am sad), Scrubs, Rove LIVE, The Simpsons

TV SHOWS I DON'T LIKE: Home & Away, Family Matters (Urkel eeeeew!), The Panel, Buffy, Angel (sorry Nathan)

ACTOR/ACTRESSES I LIKE: Nic Cage, Bruce Willis, Liv Tyler, Selma Blair, Sandra Bullock, Nicole Kidman

FAVOURITE FOOD: Just about anything. Pasta, Pizza, Curry, anything home-cooked

INTERESTS: Music, Reading fanfics, Writing Fanfics, Original Fiction (reading or writing), Cooking, Babying people, Blogging, Computer Gaming

BAD HABITS: Being too motherly, Chewing my nails when I get a snag instead of cutting them, Drawing on myself, Ridiculous sleeping patterns, Disgusting disorganistion skills, Procrastinator, Crying too easy, "Blonde" comments that are so obviously stupid everyone is left shaking thier heads, Talking too fast

GOOD HABITS: Caring about people, Always being there with a smile a hug an ear and a 'love you' for whoever needs it, A seemingly endless muse and imagination, An increasingly long fuse, The ability to take a joke (well I'm getting better anyways!)

Welcome

Welcome to my new-look blog. A bit more about me, and archives of my old blog will be uploaded soon. In the meanwhile you can find them Here