Tuesday, September 19, 2006

A Very Bad Idea

Many people these days have taken to keeping diaries, or on-line diaries also known as weblogs, I too have followed this increasingly popular trend, but after trail and error on my behalf, I have discovered my keeping a blog or a diary is not so fruitful as it appears to be for other people.

“It’s not that hard” I hear you say, but yet, I seem to have trouble, and any reader of my blog, however lacking in brain cells he or she may be would agree that it is a Very Bad Idea for me to keep a blog!

I forget them!
I diligently keep the diary/blog fairly updated and in beautiful order for maybe a month or so (though with Nath as an avid reader I have been quite well behaved recently) and then forget them, leaving them to go stale in cyber space, updating only when (IF) I remember too. I have two previously abandoned blogs, and several abandoned RL diaries. What makes anyone think I can successfully keep another… seriously? I, Miranda dare break the reputation of disorganized and lazy to do something constructive, and make use of my memory to remember something better than Alan Alda’s birthday (January 28)? BAH! Who are you fooling? Not me.

I lead a VERY boring life!
Well, I’m sure there is someone out there who would consider my life more exciting than theirs, but I have yet to meet you, I’m sure I’d LOVE to swap. 90% of my time involves working, sleeping too much, eating, surfing the net or other computer time, and spending time with my beloved. Seriously folks, the last time I left the house was to go to the doctors… and the time before that was to go to work. The last time I actually went somewhere I chose… was… was… a while ago! Now who wants to hear a blow-by-blow account of my day?

I seem to think I should put “worthy” entries in a public blog…? WTF?
Hmm… I am extremely random, and most of my thoughts and things that I would put in a diary are one-sentence entries that have little to do with anything, and tell me honestly, would YOU get excited about seeing a new entry in my diary to find that it is three words, seemingly chosen at random? “FREE THE ALPACAS” sure isn’t going to inspire awe or win me a Pulitzer prize, so I decide not to post, waiting until something note-worthy occurs, and seeing as I stated above I have a fairly unexciting life, that rarely happens.

I am rather screwed up
Actually very. Disgustingly paranoid, and hypersensitive to be honest. Hells bells, my English teacher once suggested I talk to the school counselor about something she read, when she asked us to write a diary entry about a past experience and other random shit. I don’t want to inflict that on my readers, so taking out my just plain unusual and downright creepy mannerisms and things, that doesn’t leave a whole lot of me to write about.

I ramble incessantly and have the attention span of a newt…
There’s only one way to put it. I am disgustingly long-winded. I seriously never shut up. I mean, everyone says that I could talk through wet cement. Well, not EVERYONE, mum does at any rate, Fungus just says I never stop talking. He’s nice about it. Sometimes I think he likes my rambling, specially when he’s trying to sleep, reckons it bores him to sleep. He’s joking right? I hope he’s joking. Mind you, he can talk too, he can spend a good couple of hours at his sister's place when he was "only going to be a few minutes" I'm the same when it comes to shopping though... especially when I'm on a retail therapy splurge...

See? I told you so. I can’t stick to one topic for very long, and most of my topics are utter crap! Who wants to read an entry about a whole bunch of crap that spewed from my fingertips? No one, precisely.

So why, oh why do I keep a blog? Good question, I’m not sure. It could be a trend thing, but I never was much of a (martyr before and I ain’t bout to start nothing new) sheep and I never do things just because they’re “cool”. The mystery eludes even the smartest of smart.

However as it has been proven for you above, it is a Very Bad Idea that I keep a blog, it is now that I can disclaim any responsibility for insanity that may occur to you, if you dare venture into the depths of my blog.

1 comment:

Meg said...

You must keep up with the magical funnies that spill from your fingertips Miss Miranda. I get the giggles constantly from reading your blog and love all the random tangents your mind zoots off to explore.